Over and over again

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One of the most beautiful moments with your child is when you get to see who they really are.

Standing not yet three feet tall, hair so fine and shimmery blonde; little arms raised, the room filled with eruptions of giggling all from the sheer delight of doing what she loves most; dancing. And I, I get to fall in love with her over and over again.

The beauty of innocence peeks through with her inquisitive questions, matter-of-fact statements and tears of not yet understanding her world sometimes. She rides on a teeter-totter of emotions, this toddler of mine. Sometimes I scratch my head in not knowing how to best parent her but I guess even the most famous parenting book authors have worn these shoes before.

Innately the question of “how do I train her right to help her become the women she was created to be?” bubbles up in me as often as she desires to want to “do that myself”…so, often. Hey Mom, hey Dad, have you heard about this ever empowering, impeccably timed help called grace? Its not just a word that we sing in the generationally sung song “Amazing Grace”. It really is an invisible can of spinach that helps more than Popeye when in need. I’ve discovered it. And when I do grab hold of it, it seems as if wisdom itself take the drivers seat and we sail to shore smoothly. The hardest part about parenting a toddler (that I have found) is not apprehending that precious grace. You know it when you fail to lay hold of it. The anger rises, “I said to’s” increase, and flustered sharp responses dart out of your mouth; at least mine. I hate myself in those moments. I hate failing. I know these moments will happen and I’m “only human” but they hurt her and then I’m ashamed. Grace sweeps in to free me from my shame and lead me into repentance. Grace helps me when I need saving the most. And grace teaches me to do better the next time around. We can make it you know. You can be the parent you always dreamed you would be. You can be the best parent for your child if you grab hold of that grace, in the heat of the moment. Just stop, receive the help and parent in it. Our children deserve the best don’t they? Living in grace produces the best me I can be. Not perfect, not fake, but sold to a lifestyle of forgiveness and mercy. Don’t you love falling in love with your child over and over again? I think God does the same with us when we let Him be who He is, our greatest help in our time of need.

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Dear Regret

This morning I was provoked inside myself about living in regret. I’ve watched many lives, even of those dear to me, be stolen and held captive to their perceived mistakes. Some have chosen to drink them “away” while others attempt to keep themselves in a rat race in-order to never deal with them, regret wears various faces. So I wrote a little poem. May it encourage you today to kick regret out of your home too! It only has a place with you if you let it. One of the greatest truths is that forgiveness goes a long way; whether toward yourself or others. And it does! I implore you to try it if you haven’t in a while. Happy living in the life given to you today!

Dear Regret,

I would like to inform you that you are not welcome in my home.Your invasive and persuasive grip has no one here to hold. You thought you had held me captive while concealing your malicious intent. Your list of “should-of’s” and “could-of’s” take with you as you pack up your tent. There will be no place for you if you try to come again. Mistakes are inevitable when you fall short of the glory of God. But listen now as I tell you Jesus blood washes every brick I break, every stone I throw, every despicable human low life blow. For He does not creep in and steal like you. He does not rob me through and through. He does not cripple me inside or out. He does not convince me I have no worth and cannot live by His grace. In fact He keeps me and gives me all I need, He strengthens me with His word, His presence and His peace. His mercies meet me with every dawn. His love covers me when I’m wrong. His truth frees me as I believe. You see I could tell of His goodness and His grace, I could sing of His mysteries of redemption for this wretch called me. Listen Regret! I know the key to get rid of you and not loose me. Its found in my gaze, the window to my soul. When I look at Jesus its you I no longer behold. Many try to silence you with booze, pills, or some form of noise. Each their own variation. But for me I only need a veil of separation. Christ can free any chain you try to control with! Any binding word you hope will hold me. Jesus already went to hell and back and took those very keys. I know you will try and visit again but know this truth right now. I bow to no one else but the one whose worthy of all crowns.

Small Beginnings

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As a “closet” writer I’ve found great peace as I have placed my thoughts onto paper. For many years what began as a question in my heart would often resolve itself whether in wisdom or soberness as I wrote. For this reason, like several others (I’m most certain), I have toyed with the idea of creating a blog. In my current season of life I have a small family and a dashingly handsome husband to care for (Whom would blush if he saw I wrote “dashingly handsome” for the world to read).  Yet for anyone who is in this season of life or has found themselves on the other end of it, you know it brings its great joys and many challenges. As I begin sharing some of our family funnies, our failings or our faith, I hope you find yourself encouraged. Grab a pillow to rest on, a beverage in-hand and an open heart to journey with us in our small beginnings.